Rest In Pieces, Stan:

Yes, everyone is okay.  None of us were at fault.  But I had no idea that our girls would mourn the passing of their first car with such feeling.

They learned to drive in Stan.  They raced to school in Stan.  Stan has been to Colorado and Wisconsin and Chicago.  Oh, and let’s not discuss the thousands we have put into Stan in the last year or so to keep him going in his old age.  We thought we knew him, so we’d replace this and that.  Four thousand in the past months.  Not to mention the frivolous repairs recommended last summer by the Nissan dealer in Fort Collins, who failed to recognize the actual, dangerous problem.  Thank God my kid survived driving through Nebraska.   

PSA: do not go to the Fort Collins Nissan dealer for service.  Ever.   All your Nissan service and sales through our friends at Eden Prairie Nissan.  

I suppose it's another rite of passage: getting your first car, seeing your first car at the end.  

Why do our cars have names?  Why don’t yours?  Stan earned his by being Stan, not the mini-van.  Magic Bus, you were good to us.  Perfect for a newborn and a toddler. 

In 2006, when we first got said minivan, I learned the hard way that the back hatch would hit the metal garage door handle when opened fully.  A tiny nick by the licence plate, the first day we had it home.  “This is why we can’t have anything new or nice”.   I had to order Galaxy Black touch up paint THAT DAY so that we could fix it ASAP. 

While we waited for the paint to arrive at the dealer, I turned too sharply into the parking ramp at work.  The aggregate rock wall scraped like witch’s fingernails down the entire passenger side.  Nobody noticed ding above the licence plate.   We still can’t have anything new or nice…

A month before the accident, our daughter was freaking out about a paint chip below Stan’s gas cap.   “It’s rusting!  It’s going to be trashy!  My sister never takes care of anything!  We need touch up paint, STAT!” (yes, she really said ‘stat’ about finding matching paint for a 13 year old vehicle.  And when she’s upset she speaks in all caps and exclamation points).

Again, we’re not concerned any longer about the touch up paint.

In residency, we were paid every two weeks.  Our cars have always known when we had a 3 paycheck month, and behaved accordingly.  Oh, you only think you have some extra cash this month–the repair was almost always equal to the extra paycheck.  Recently, my wife’s pay switched to biweekly instead of monthly.  Coincidence or cosmic event?  You decide.

An example of what’s wrong with the world we live in:

Within a week of the accident, we had 3 “personal” invitations for chiropractic therapy and one from a personal injury lawyer.  All addressed to my daughter.  GAH.